A FRIDGE FULL OF FOOD...

Life as a Failed Easter Dessert

 

After hours, over half the day actually, of planning, mixing, kneading, chilling, boiling, dyeing, more rolling, more chilling, resting, mixing, rolling, filling, spreading, moving, shaping, pre-heating, cutting out decorations, egg washing, and sugar sprinkling, I slipped my multi-pound  humongo Easter masterpiece into the oven for it's hour-long bake and slumped down into my chair to watch TV and knit for my little Littles a bit while anticipating every sweet decadent pastry bite following Easter dinner.

And that's exactly how it would have ended in a movie, with a perfectly made up, but with just enough dusting of flour on one perfectly blushed cheekbone to let us know how HARD Julia Roberts worked in creating that amazing pastry using no experience and only the drive of personal willpower all the while squeezed into a niney minute framework as she pulled out the glorious, perfectly browned orgasmic dessert from her fake movie set oven.

Well kids...I ain't Julia Roberts. Nor am I Martha Stewart.  The reality in my life turned out to be that fifteen minutes after turning over my baby to that monster freak called my oven, I physically followed a slightly acrid and puzzling scent into my real working kitchen to see black smoking pouring out of the oven vent and opened the door to see my creation melting and dripping everywhere like the Wicked Witch of the West after a shower.

Pissed off? You betcha.  All that work and money for ingredients wasted, but the more than that, my hope was mocked. That's what hurt the most.  I was hugely disappointed but--evenutally--after releasing my annoyance with a good slam of the oven door, stomping out of the kitchen, and crying like a big baby in my bedroom for fifteen minutes,I could also see that as many things that do go well for me in the kitchen even when attempting dishes I've never prepared before, the Vegas odds are there's going to be a few failures along the way as well. When I had a chance to stop and think about it objectively, I realized that the bigger truth in this is that through this kitchen disaster I've learned more unforgettable baking lessons in one afternoon than I've learned in the last year from my successes.  That is the definition of experience. 

Baking Bread

BAKING BREAD    

By Carol Lynn Pearson  in "Women I Have Known and Been"

There seemed more accusation

Than admiration

In Vivian's voice

When she said,

"Well, I wish I had time

to bake bread!"

And so sometimes when

The loaves were in the oven

And Vivian was at the door

Louise mumbled something about

Another bake sale again

And never even tried to explain

Her near-religious ritual:

How the flour on her fingers

Was the sun and the rain

And the earth

How the thump of her palms

On the dough

Was the dance of women

On the ancient threshing floor

How the smell of the baking

Leavened her

And left her believing that

We rise, we rise

And

How the cutting 

Of the first warm slice

For the first child home

Made her a bounterous goddess

With life in her hand. 

Quote from the Las Vegas Review-Journal

THE PUNCH LINE

An e-mail signed "Venetian bartender" says US Airways pilot Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger has spawned a new cocktail -- The Sully Martini: "Two shots of Grey Goose and a big splash of water."

 

Thought for the Day

This quote has absolutely nothing to do with food other than the blessing that I have found through meeting so many nice people by blogging. 

Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.

Leo Buscaglia, American Author

 

I have to sleep today, having worked the weekend, but I have a lot of great recipes this week like the bread pudding I took to work last night and more.

(Sorry for the small type but I can't get Typepad to publish the quote the way I want it and I've been up for over 24 hours now so I'm on the verge of losing my ever-lovin' shit over this inanimate box if I keep messing with it.  I hate computers some days. They are evil and have a mind of their own. Nighty night.)

Cartoon of the Day

Food Quote for the Day

 

You can say this for ready-mixes - the next generation isn't going to have any trouble making pies exactly like mother used to make.  ~Earl Wilson

Food Quote of the Day

               

We are living in a world today where lemonade is made from artificial flavors and furniture polish is made from real lemons.  ~Alfred E. Newman

Gastritis update:  My stomach's still queasy but I should be back to cooking within a day or two.  There will be new food posts sometime soon.

Quotes for Food: "I gave him cheeeeeeeese."

Cheese--milk's leap toward immortality.
- - - Clifton Fadiman

Food Quote of the Day

A meal, however simple, is a moment of intersection. It is at once the most basic, the most fundamental, of our life's activities, maintaining the life of our bodies; shared with others it can be an occasion of joy and communion, uniting people deeply.

Elise Boulding

Cooking Joke of the Day: Thoughts for Food

While attending a marriage seminar on communication, Wally and his wife Carolyn listened to the instructor declare, "It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other." He addressed the men, "Can you describe your wife's favorite flower?"

Wally leaned over, touched Carolyn's arm gently and whispered, "King Arthur White Whole Wheat, isn't it?"