...and the Spirit of Christmas Upchucked All Over My House

There's something about ice storms that creates a frenzy of nesting.  Sure, maybe it's because last year at Christmastime we had the every 20 year ice storm from hell where Gene and I personally were without power for a whole eight hours but we had friends without power for up to THREE WEEKS.  There's an ice storm warning out for the whole area for the next...oh...three DAYS so the good news is the pantry is mostly full, the gas tanks topped off, I don't have to work until tomorrow night and only that one night for several days. Hmmm...that leaves me with cold, dreary freezing rain outside the windows which always gives me the itch to clean the house or, in this case, decorate the house with every Christmas doodad I've collected over the last 25 years.

Yes, of course I'll show photos and you'll feel sorry for Gene for having to wake up dreaming he's been camping out in the The Christmas Store.

Living room tree with Gene's Grinches and Christmas Bugs lined up. (Substitutes for children--the children in us.)

And here's the tree skirt that I absolutely love:

The side table in the kitchen with obviously the Nativity in the center. Flanked on each side are "Baking Santa" with cookies and gingerbread adornments

and if you look closely, the Christmas tree has mini baking tool ornaments on it.

Then about 7pm tonight it suddenly hit me. I MUST bake Christmas cake. I must.  I have no idea why it hit me so hard except for the challenge, the mystery, the sense of missing out on something.  You see, I have a google alert set up for "cake" just so I don't miss any great recipes or the occasional geek wedding cake designed to look like Yoda (I'm not kidding) or whatever. For the last several weeks the Brits have been going Christmas cake apeshit and...well...as a small child I never liked anyone to get anything I didn't.  Apparently it's still true as an adult so I decided that not another day could go by without me putting a Christmas cake, aka fruit cake, into the oven for most of the evening.

But there's an ice storm, remember?  I wasn't sure I had all the ingredients but I was determined and where there is a will there will be a way found or I get very cranky with myself.

After reading for weeks about Christmas cakes my final inspiration over the edge was Angela from A Spoonful of Sugar and her Christmas Cake (Thanks Angela!).  With apologies to Angela, I have to admit that as much as I wanted to follow her recipe exactly I had to substitute here and there and I cut the recipe down quite a bit and changed all the conversions into cups and so forth. So if you try my version (at the end)  and think "feh" then don't blame Angela, okay?

I used what I had instead of risking life and limb to go to the grocery in the ice storm. For one, I didn't go get the red and green cherries that I remember Mom having in her kitchen when I was growing up but I don't remember eating them in anything. She either snuck them in something or I've blocked out the memory of childhood fruit cakes.  Not sure on that one.  See? It might be a grown up taste.  But when I was a kid I didn't know there was supposed to be booze in it either so I might have had a better attitude in the sneak into the fruitcake instead of sneak into the home-made candy department. 

I dug around in the pantry and found a small bag of my favorite Dole dried fruit bits including cherries, apricots, golden raisins, etc., a small bag of plump dark raisins, and a some dried pineapple. Works for me!  For booze I had a choice of 15 year old Macallan scotch, Southen Comfort, or Crown Royal.  I chose the Southern Comfort. Smells fruitier.

You're supposed to cook with what you like, right?

When the cake came out of the oven and I had spooned over the 2 Tbsp of Southern Comfort like Angela said to do, I leaned down and took a big whiff. Quite frankly, after years of running away from old people toting those long square baguette-ish commercial fruit cakes that smell like ass and taste like sawdust, I really didn't have high expectations, compulsion to bake one or not.  But you know what? Freshly out of the oven and with a little joy juice basting, not too bad. My cake is not very big or tall but it emits a rich spicy, fruity, warm aroma that begs to be bitten into. I SWEAR!!!!  I held myself back (seriously) and will wait until Christmas.  I know I started late but I still have time to feed my little pet project more SC before the big day--and I will be showing you and telling you all about it when I do nip in!

Glenna's (Small) Christmas Cake

recipe by Glenna Anderson Muse

Makes 1 small loaf-sized cake.

Pre-heat oven to 300 degrees (F).

In a small saucepan, combine and bring to a soft boil:

3 Tbsp unsalted butter

1/2 cup dark brown sugar, packed

1 cup mixed dried fruit of choice: raisins, apricots, pineapple, etc.

grated zest and juice from 1 orange

grated zest from 1 lemon

1/3 cup Southern Comfort, brandy, or rum

Turn heat down and simmer for 10 minutes until fruit is plump and syrup is thickened somewhat.

Take off heat and add 2 Tbsp almond paste. Stir until melted and worked in.  Set mixture aside to cool.

When cool, turn into bowl and stir in by hand:

1 tsp baking powder

1/2 cup all-purpose flour

1/3 cup chopped almonds

1 large egg plus 1 egg yolk, beaten

1/2 tsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp cardamom

1/2 tsp nutmeg

1/4 tsp allspice

1/4 tsp ginger

Spray loaf pan with cooking spray and line all the way up long sides with waxed paper.  Cooking spray wax paper.

Turn batter into pan and cook for 40 minutes on 300 degrees. Turn down oven to 275 and bake for 1 hour longer or until cake is firm but not dried out.

While cake is still warm prick all over with a toothpick and spoon 2 Tbsp more liquor over the top.  When cake is completely cooled, wrap in waxed paper, foil, and either place inside and airtight container or  double gallon-sized freezer baggies and place in a cool dark cupboard. Every five-seven days, reprick the with a toothpick, alternating top and bottom, and "feed" the cake 2 more Tbsp of liquor. 

Cake can be frozen for up to several months.

Comments

[sher]

Wow! I'm really impressed with what you've done! I keep saying I'll decorate the house, but the elves haven't come to help me. Now I feel guilty looking at what you've done.

And get that cake so drunk, the cops will be outside your house giving people field sobriety tests after they eat it!

[Angela]

Your cake looks great, Glenna! I really like the fruit combination that you chose--and I'm relieved that you didn't go driving in an ice storm just to buy ingredients!!

Fruitcakes are very forgiving: as long as you have the right proportion of fruit to glue (err, batter) then they'll turn out just fine. And if you lavish enough booze on it, then it'll blow all those dry sawdust cakes right out of the water! (I never realised that all my American friends refused Christmas cake because they thought it would be dry!)

[Kenneth]

Gene need some Animaniacs under the tree. Looks better than moms..

[MyKitchenInHalfCups]

I've put out about 3 Christmas things and Gorn's done some lights.
But you've really done beautifully. I love the top & bottom of your big tree and the little one with all the kitchen gadgets. And the tree skirt! Wonderful.
That's a Christmas Cake. Well, done.

[Susan P]

Christmas? bah humbug

[Glenna]

Sher--Hey, I like that idea about the sobriety checkpoint in front of the house! Very creative. A goal!

Angela--Thanks for the inspiration! You know, I think you pinned it down. The big thing about fruit cake is the dryness. The only commercial one I've ever really liked is Harry & David's tropical one with pineapple and macadamias but I think part of it might be because H&D's products are all so good and that cake isn't dry.

Kenneth--Hey bubba! Thanks! I feel kind of guilty that you said that but I have a big ass grin on my face!

And you're right. Definitely Animaniacs...or Pinky and the Brain!!!!! Wouldnt' that be a cool tree if you could decorate the whole thing in those characters?

Tanna--Thanks! Can't wait to see what all you cook and decorate this month!

Susan--Oh no! Not bah humbug...peace and joy and good food and lots of friends and family!

[Kristina]

What? No Charlie Brown tree like last year? :) Your house looks amazing Glenna!

[Chris]

Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas....:)

[Glenna]

Kristina--I know. I'm disappointed. The CB tree is in a box in the garage and I can't get Gene to put it up on the porch where I want it. I think it would be cool!

Chris--A LOT! LOL!

[Fruittart]

I always hated fruitcake, but every year my grandmother made them and gave them liberal drinks of brandy every day so the things weighed a ton from absorbed alcohol. Her Polish neighbors loved them so she made them every year and gave a few away and nibbled on her own personal cake for a couple of weeks. Thanks for bringing back that memory!

Melody ;-)

[Glenna]

Hi Melody! (Sorry for screwing up your name on earlier posts)-- I KNOW! I've always hated fruit cakes but I thought maybe there would be a difference if it was homemade and I could control the ingredients. We'll test that theory in just about 10 days, eh? hehehehe

[Deborah Dowd]

Your decorations are gorgeous! Thanks for sharing with all of us!

[Glenna]

Thanks, Deborah!